Monday, March 9, 2015

Dealing with Stress and What I Learn

I don't like being in a state of stress.  I know there is stress all around in daily life.  I get that, but you know the little drama that pops up from time to time.  I am solution oriented, so my reaction is to figure out what is causing the feelings I am having and come up with a plan to work through it.  The drama isn't what challenges me as much as it is the feelings that surface.

The things I continue to learn about myself:

~I am getting better at identifying the specific causes.  You know really pin pointing the root.
~I am a processor.  By that I mean I need to process things, usually verbally, out loud, to my husband.  Who always graciously listens.  Sometimes he knows nothing about the topic but he also knows I need to "talk it out".  (Hmmm wonder where my oldest son gets that from.) And he doesn't try to fix me.
~I am learning new tools to deal with the feelings that stem from issues/drama.  I am a "head on" person, so I like to deal with issues up front and honestly.  But the feelings that the issues create in my body, that is a bit harder to handle.  I have had not-so-good coping mechanisms in the past, but am really learning new tools.
~I really can change the tools in my tool box.  Even though some of my coping mechanisms come from YEARS/DECADES of habit, they can be changed.
~I am so grateful that I love myself enough to make those changes, and work hard to do what is right for me.
~I have learned to say no, and say it easily, without any guilt attached.  I know when it is time for me to let things go, and move on to something new.

So even though the stressful times are harder, I really learn things about myself with each step.  And life seems to all come together in the end.

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