Monday, June 16, 2014

Art and Art Journaling

Art journaling is a recent discovery.  I never really thought about keeping a journal for art work, something that releases the feelings inside me in a way that journaling can not.  I loved painting and drawing when I was about pre Jr High School age, somewhere up until around the age 11 or 12.  But some where around Jr High, people become judgmental about what it is you create.  When you are five and six years old everything you do is cute, then suddenly as you get older it becomes either good or bad art. Kind of sucks the fun out of creating anything.  You go from there to High School and then you really need to figure out what you want to do with your life.  You have to pick, you can't do it all, you have to focus.  Nursing was my goal at that point, so the classes were all college prep classes, with some music on the side.  I put painting out of my mind then.

After college I picked up some things again, I dug out my crochet hooks/yarn starting crocheting again and also began quilting, that was enjoyable, and I still find that gratification in seeing how yarns and fabrics will come together when sewn, crocheted, knitted together.  But lately I have been digging back into the painting, and drawing.

Painting my feelings out while listening to different types of music, or painting what I am thinking or feeling after I finish meditating, is therapeutic.  Another technique I am finding helpful is to journal in my art journal, to write out something I am stuck on or want to explore further, or release, then paint over it.  Cover up some parts and leave others exposed.  I try to work in my art journal daily.  It is so peaceful in the morning, when the house is quiet, and I can just spend a little time by myself, to open up my journal and my art journal and delve into and onto the pages.  Some is very personal, which is why I like the idea of the art journal.  It is for ME.  I can choose to share or not share my art journal with others.  There is no expectation of anyone else ever seeing what is in there, so it is OK to just paint, when I have no idea or completed picture in my head.  It is OK to make random marks on a page and let that be the beginning of something or nothing.  I do share some of my art journal pages with my family and a few close friends, but that is really hard.  It seems like when I do share there is subconsciously an expectation of a reaction, good or bad.  There is an anticipation of judgment.  And, if you read my blog at all, you know that is HARD for me, risking exposure.  It is something I want to change.  I want to be OK with exposure.  I want to be OK letting myself out of the box, feel those feelings and not stay so closed up inside, take the risk.

So here is some of my artwork, for your viewing pleasure or not ;-)  As you can see some of these have journaling written under the painting, some not.  Some are from a workshop I am taking, some stem from meditation, a couple were painted to music, and a couple were started with random marks on a page.  It is very freeing to just make random marks, with no intention, and see where it takes you, what your intuition speaks in your ear, what you see as you look at those marks, where your soul leads.  The paintings speak volumes to me, words I need to hear, images that nourish.

My muse speaking to me

A mandala piece, (you can see my little pug, Violet at the bottom of the pic :-)

This is a journaling piece, lots of juicy text under there. 

A journey of healing

Painting to music after meditation, started with random black lines on a page (you can see where my heart lives!)

Another painting to music after meditation, words I needed to hear

A piece after meditation on something specific. 

A work in progress as I journey with Inanna. 

Have you ever had that thought "I wish I could paint".  Well you CAN!  Anyone can.  Just go ahead, find some paper and whatever you have around your house and start now.

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